Street Signs: +1 Philly

A Philadelphia Haiku:

At least we know how
to put numbers on our street
signs. Trust me - it helps.

International: +1 New York

The other night, at my friend's parents' apartment in Stockholm, I was offered a slice of cake by a model. And by model, I mean her sister's boyfriend, impeccably dressed as if he were ready to go yachting. A piece of his side-swept blond hair fell in front of his handsome and very tanned face as he smirked and suggested:

"An American-sized portion for you, then."

Damn straight.

Seriously though, I have found that the only redeeming factor I have with most Europeans is the fact that I live in New York. It is the only city they find as acceptable, if not more so, than their own.

Ironic, I thought, as I watched him swirl his red wine before smelling it and taking a sip, clearly rewarding himself for his insightful wit. He is just as ignorant and arrogant as the stereotyped American attitude he is so disdainful of.

* UPDATE: I forgot to mention that the grandfather, didn't speak English to me at all until he found out I lived in New York. He strung together some sentences, basically telling me that Woody Allen and Larry David are his personal heros, and that he saw "Whatever Works" twice, in theaters. Maybe, I thought, this man is my hero.

Money: -1 Philly

Our poor little city is broke.
And our poor little pool is closed.

















Sigh.

Cheaper Flights: +1 New York

Flying internationally (nationally, even) out of Philly sucks. Other than the fact that it's way more expensive, my only memories of the Philadelphia Airport are family trips to Florida, dressed in windbreakers, pleated khaki shorts, and Disney visors.

Plus, just look how fucking glamorous JFK is:

Quality of Life: +1 PHL

Moving from Philadelphia to New York has afforded me a unique perspective on the quality of life experienced in both. After a recent trip back to the big cheesesteak, my first since moving to NYC, a few things became painfully apparent.

Playing tennis... is sooooo easy in Philadelphia. I can access 8 courts for free within a 15 minute bike ride and it's unlikely I'll have to wait. In NYC, it would go down something like, I pay $100 for a permit (even though the season is half over) and wait at least an hour at a court in downtown Brooklyn or Manhattan. Or pay $7 an hour. Hey maybe tennis can be an urban sport after all!

Swimming freely... as there is an abundance of chlorinated municipal real estate in Philly. Granted, the Red Hook pool looks amazing from the outside. But it is regularly packed to the gills is perfect. By my estimation, it is easy to happen upon a half empty pool in PHL to have all to yourself. However, this will most like become an unreality as Nutter has threatened to close all pools, libraries, etc. during the crisis mode budget.

Eating fresh vegetables... because they come from your own garden. Yes, even with a crummy food service job it is possible to acquire arable land in your little concrete corner of the world, and harvest edible food! We just grilled up some huge eggplants, and boy were they yummy. And still a few dozen plump tomatoes and other veggies on the way. Not to mention throwing some fresh basil on a slice of Tacconelli's.

State tax... just went up AGAIN in New York. On a recent ride up with a friend, he realized last moment that he needed to purchase cheaper liquor down in the keystone. I then suggested he should probably get a carton of ciggies too. $110 spent rather quickly, but also ~$60 saved.

UPDATE:
Laundry... well, I think you get the idea.

I couldn't really find an appropriate picture, but I think this one of a happy dog from the region will do:

"The Peoples Beach": +1 New York

Well the Philly kids have already been there, so duh it's awesome. But I figured it should be recorded for posterity. Plus, I'm headed there, like, in two minutes. Srsly. I'm hooked.

Jacob Riis Park rules because of the following:

- Very little commercial space- just a concession stand for the

necessities.

- You can bring a cooler of beer.

- The gays know how to party, even when it rains, briefly, as it did when we went there.

- The eastern part, Bay 1 and Bay 2, has a topless section. Holy boobs!

- It's easy to forget you are in New York City.

- Queens is slowly beginning to reveal its awesomeness to me, finally, after 5 years of living here.

- The original Riis originally opened the beach because he sympathized with the "plight of the poor." Wow.

- It's everything Coney is not.